It has been forever since I have "blogged," so this is pretty weird. I'm so used to scrapbooking everything... or at least trying to. Since we still live far away from our family and some of our friends, I thought this would be an easier way to keep everyone updated if you want to be.
The main reason for me wanting to start this blog is to share our journey with our close friends and family. Most of you know that Tim and I have been on a difficult journey for a few years now in trying to start a family.

To make this part of the story short - we tried for quite some time to have a child with no success. So, we decided to go through with some testing and a few different treatments. My body went through a complete roller coaster ride of different hormones and they adversely affected me...causing more damage than good. From the beginning the doctors speculated that I had PCOS (poly-cystic ovarian syndrome) and possibly endometriosis, which can only be confirmed through surgery. Around last year at this time my doctor advised me to undergo surgery to try and treat my cystic ovaries. We were told this surgery (hysteroscopy and laparoscopy) would increase our chances for up to a year. So we saw a short window of opportunity of starting a family. It was a hard decision to make but we decided to go forward with it. Overall, the surgery went well and my final diagnosis was endometriosis and PCOS.

A few months following the surgery, we started treatment to stimulate my ovaries with intramuscular injections and oral medications... talk about fun!?! With each cycle we went through, I was closely monitored by ultrasound and blood tests. With each of the injection cycles there was only a 20% chance of pregnancy and so we were not shocked to learn that the first round did not work. The medication I was on ended up causing more problems than we thought - the endometriosis came back very quickly. With a little hope and a lighter bank account we threw ourselves into one final attempt with fertility treatment and testing. Our final ultrasound revealed no baby, no heartbeat, and the endometriosis had taken pretty much taken over my left ovary. I cannot explain to you how hard that day was... the finality of it all. But in a way, I think God gave Tim and I exactly what we needed to see... that this door was closed. For over a year and a half we were faced with so many what if's, treatment options, and possibilities and now we knew we had reached the end of the road. After many prayers, heart aches, surgery, treatment and many mood swings (thanks to fertility meds), Tim and I decided to stop with all the treatment.

Thank the Lord that our story does not end there! Now I have to go back a little bit because I missed a crucial part throughout all of this. Before we saw our fertility doctor, I had been doing alot of online research on adoption. One of the adoption agencies I was considering was/is called Bethany Christian Adoptions Services. Through Bethany a new adoption agency was created and is called Snowflake Embryo Adoption. Okay, I know this may be very confusing to understand... it was for me at first too!

I know what you're thinking, "Ruth, what is embryo adoption?" I'm so glad you asked! I'll try and explain this as best I can. Through the infertility treatment process of In-vitro fertilization (joined sperm and egg outside of womb) many embryos are created. Often times, more embryos are created than implanted into the mother's womb. Until the family decided what to do with the extra embryos, they are cryopreserved in frozen straws. After a couple is done with their "family planning," they have a few options in regard to the remaining embryos. Their options include 1) donate them to stem-cell research 2) have them terminated 3) donate them or give them up for adoption.

When I first learned about embryo adoption I was immediately drawn to it. Tim and I have always wanted to adopt and embryo adoption would be the best of both worlds - carrying our adopted child! As crazy as it sounds, I have always wanted to experience the whole pregnancy and delivery. Through the very unique gift of embryo adoption, we would be able to do just that and ensure that our child gets proper prenatal care. More importantly, we believe that this is an affirmative, life-saving option for unborn children.

So when we reached the end of infertility treatment, we naturally felt drawn to this type of adoption. Through our infertility clinic in North Carolina, they perform embryo adoptions. As with international and domestic adoptions, there are different types of openness. The type that of adoption that we will be doing is completely closed. We will receive basic information, stats, and health records from the "donating couple." The embryologist and staff members at our clinic try to match embryos based on our preferences and things like race, height, weight, hair and eye color.

The fertility clinic we have been on the waiting list for about 5 months and this past weekend our name finally "came up." I cannot tell you how overjoyed we are to be matched and hopefully start our new family in the near future. God has so mightily blessed us these past few months and we could not be more grateful for this amazing gift.

It is not set in stone yet, but it looks like I will fly to Cary in late April for the FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer). As we believe that each embryo is a life, we specifically told our doctor and embryologist to only thaw as many embryos as they would implant in me. So, the most my doctor implant is three embryos. Very sadly sometimes the embryos do not survive the thaw and so that is also a possibility for us. Following "the thaw" my doctor will implant the embryos in me. I will be on a few medications to get my body ready for and to sustain a pregnancy. My doctor has said that although my body cannot produce a pregnancy so easily, it is definitely able to carry a baby. So yes, we could have twins or even triplets but the chances are not very high. I really do not want to be like "Octamom!" lol

We know that this may seem like a really crazy idea but we strongly believe that God is calling us to this option for starting a family. This topic can be a very sensitive subject for people but we feel that it is so vitally important to inform people of this new option for adoption.

The main reason for writing this blog is to ask/beg/plead for your prayers. We know and trust that ultimately God's will will be done. With that in mind we ask you to pray for the following:

1) That God would guide us through this journey and give us peace.
2) That my body will be regulated well and react positively to all the medications.
3) To grant safe travel to Cary.
4) To guide the doctors and embryologists work as they thaw and God-willing will transfer the embryos.
5) That my womb will be a good home to sustain the life of the embryos.
6) If the transfer results in pregnancy God would grant us good health.

Thank you for your time, thoughts and prayers. So many of you have been so supportive throughout this whole process and we are touched for such dear family and friends. You are all a gift to us!
We will keep you all updated! And I promise my posts will not be this long every time. :)